Thursday, December 15, 2011
Letter 24
Dearest Peapod,
Your birthday is now past, and I cannot yet fathom I am the mommy to a 1 year old. Gone are the days of holding you in my arms to rock you to sleep. The days of your adventures have begun. Seeking out the dangers and gifts of this world, you walk gracefully in my shadow, following where I lead. I know I must set the example, yet I fear the example you see. Although I realize I am less than perfect, and my God forgives my shortcomings, I despair at the thought you might only see my faults. I pray, for your sake, you are more like YOU, and less like me. You are so incredibly innocent and trusting; I am so very damaged and unable to trust. You seek the comfort of all; I find no comfort. You realize you are not always in control and need help; I refuse to believe I am not in control nor can I ask for help. As the years continue to pass for you my sweet sprout, I hope you never change.
I love you my innocent pea,
Mommy
Your birthday is now past, and I cannot yet fathom I am the mommy to a 1 year old. Gone are the days of holding you in my arms to rock you to sleep. The days of your adventures have begun. Seeking out the dangers and gifts of this world, you walk gracefully in my shadow, following where I lead. I know I must set the example, yet I fear the example you see. Although I realize I am less than perfect, and my God forgives my shortcomings, I despair at the thought you might only see my faults. I pray, for your sake, you are more like YOU, and less like me. You are so incredibly innocent and trusting; I am so very damaged and unable to trust. You seek the comfort of all; I find no comfort. You realize you are not always in control and need help; I refuse to believe I am not in control nor can I ask for help. As the years continue to pass for you my sweet sprout, I hope you never change.
I love you my innocent pea,
Mommy
Monday, November 28, 2011
Letter 23
My dearest Peapod,
With Thanksgiving sadly behind us, I am reminded once again of the power of prayer. I hope I am able to teach you about the open lines of communication to Jesus. I hope I am able to show you the way to a true Friend, Healer, Companion, and Redeemer through prayer. Too often we, as humans, only pray when we are lost and looking for You to guide us on our way. We plead for Your mercy in situations we realize are out of our control. We ask for Your abundant giving, neglecting to offer You thanks for the blessings You richly bless us with each and every day. I am guilty of these things, my sweet youngling. Sadly, I find myself deep in prayer when I need His help and not nearly enough in giving thanks for what He has provided. Although I know in 1 Thessalonians 5:17, we are commanded to "Pray without ceasing," He does not stop there. We are also commanded, "In everything, give thanks, for this is the will of Jesus Christ concerning you," (1 Thessalonians 5:18). All through my pregancy, I prayed for your health. I prayed for a safe and painless (or as painless as possible) delivery. I prayed our families would journey to the hospital safely for your arrival. I prayed all of these things, asking Him once again to do MY will. Yet, I know that today, I have not thanked Him for my safe travel to deliver you safely to the sitter's home. I know today I have not thanked Him for the opportunity to hear you laugh this morning. After all, it was His will we were granted the time to spend with one another this morning.
I am thankful for each moment He grants me to spend with you, and it's time I told Him.
I love you my sweet blessing,
Mommy
With Thanksgiving sadly behind us, I am reminded once again of the power of prayer. I hope I am able to teach you about the open lines of communication to Jesus. I hope I am able to show you the way to a true Friend, Healer, Companion, and Redeemer through prayer. Too often we, as humans, only pray when we are lost and looking for You to guide us on our way. We plead for Your mercy in situations we realize are out of our control. We ask for Your abundant giving, neglecting to offer You thanks for the blessings You richly bless us with each and every day. I am guilty of these things, my sweet youngling. Sadly, I find myself deep in prayer when I need His help and not nearly enough in giving thanks for what He has provided. Although I know in 1 Thessalonians 5:17, we are commanded to "Pray without ceasing," He does not stop there. We are also commanded, "In everything, give thanks, for this is the will of Jesus Christ concerning you," (1 Thessalonians 5:18). All through my pregancy, I prayed for your health. I prayed for a safe and painless (or as painless as possible) delivery. I prayed our families would journey to the hospital safely for your arrival. I prayed all of these things, asking Him once again to do MY will. Yet, I know that today, I have not thanked Him for my safe travel to deliver you safely to the sitter's home. I know today I have not thanked Him for the opportunity to hear you laugh this morning. After all, it was His will we were granted the time to spend with one another this morning.
I am thankful for each moment He grants me to spend with you, and it's time I told Him.
I love you my sweet blessing,
Mommy
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
Letter 22
Dear Peapod,
Each Mommy finds amazement and sadness in each of their child's "firsts." For me, I placed a great importance on all of your first holidays. I have a onesie, shirt, or bib (in some cases, all of the above) for each of the holidays you experienced for the first time, as well as the memory in dressing you. Your first Christmas was also your first holiday (not counting your glorious birthday), and to say you didn't welcome Christmas night is an understatement. You were so tired, and your little tummy pained you so that you cried through most of the dinner, all of the gift opening, and finally cried yourself to sleep. Your exhausted parents passed you back and forth, hiding in your Grammy and PawPaw's bedroom, trying to quiet your sobs. Your Grammy finally came in to trade shifts, and miraculously she silenced your wails and walked you right to sleep. She's always been a source of great comfort to babies of ALL ages (hint hint!). Your first New Year's was spent the same way, and I began to think you just didn't like holidays--but then the season of love that arrives in February changed that. Dressed in red with pink hearts, you were the reason for the love in our home. You were holding your head up on your own, beginning to recognize faces, and it broke my heart when our daily trips of cuddling came to an end as I had to return to work. Your first St. Patrick's day, I had two outfits for you to wear, so I had to change you to get pictures in both. You looked so pretty in green! You had started to roll over just in time for Grammy's birthday on the 25th. Your first Easter was truly a joy. Your NaNa bought you a beautiful purple dress that you spit up all over, but not before we took tons of pictures. You went on your first Easter egg hunt with Daddy, trying to beat Mackenzie to all of the eggs. You spent the afternoon spitting up all over your PawPaw--it seemed every time he got himself cleaned up, you would douse him all over again! Your first Memorial Day was truly your first day of independence--you got your ears pierced! Well, I guess it really wasn't independent since I made the decision for you--but you barely even cried. You were already so strong my sweet girl. Your first 4th of July was spent with your NaNa and Pappy, and you had started sitting up by yourself. We put you in an inflattable swimming pool for the first time, and you were the cutest little tadpole! Your swimsuit, so tiny--I didn't think there was any way you would fit into it, but it fit you perfectly. You splashed and played, already such a big girl. Here we are, with the passing of your first Halloween. We had to trick-or-treat with both sets of grandparents, so you were able to wear Tinkerbell the first night, but your Grammy in her wise shopping was able to find you a Peapod outfit! I can't tell you the smile you brought to my face:) On Halloween night, you walked with the rest of the big kids right up to the homes to show off your costume and trick-or-treat, and no one remembered ever seeing such a magnificent Tinkerbell. You are such a blessing to your Daddy and me. I am quick to realize there's only one more first holiday for you, and it's fitting your last "first" holiday is Thanksgiving. It's a reminder of how thankful I am for the year I have spent with you, the rich gift given to me by Him that I did not deserve but that I cherish with each fleeting moment.
I love you my blessing, my first peapod!
Mommy
Each Mommy finds amazement and sadness in each of their child's "firsts." For me, I placed a great importance on all of your first holidays. I have a onesie, shirt, or bib (in some cases, all of the above) for each of the holidays you experienced for the first time, as well as the memory in dressing you. Your first Christmas was also your first holiday (not counting your glorious birthday), and to say you didn't welcome Christmas night is an understatement. You were so tired, and your little tummy pained you so that you cried through most of the dinner, all of the gift opening, and finally cried yourself to sleep. Your exhausted parents passed you back and forth, hiding in your Grammy and PawPaw's bedroom, trying to quiet your sobs. Your Grammy finally came in to trade shifts, and miraculously she silenced your wails and walked you right to sleep. She's always been a source of great comfort to babies of ALL ages (hint hint!). Your first New Year's was spent the same way, and I began to think you just didn't like holidays--but then the season of love that arrives in February changed that. Dressed in red with pink hearts, you were the reason for the love in our home. You were holding your head up on your own, beginning to recognize faces, and it broke my heart when our daily trips of cuddling came to an end as I had to return to work. Your first St. Patrick's day, I had two outfits for you to wear, so I had to change you to get pictures in both. You looked so pretty in green! You had started to roll over just in time for Grammy's birthday on the 25th. Your first Easter was truly a joy. Your NaNa bought you a beautiful purple dress that you spit up all over, but not before we took tons of pictures. You went on your first Easter egg hunt with Daddy, trying to beat Mackenzie to all of the eggs. You spent the afternoon spitting up all over your PawPaw--it seemed every time he got himself cleaned up, you would douse him all over again! Your first Memorial Day was truly your first day of independence--you got your ears pierced! Well, I guess it really wasn't independent since I made the decision for you--but you barely even cried. You were already so strong my sweet girl. Your first 4th of July was spent with your NaNa and Pappy, and you had started sitting up by yourself. We put you in an inflattable swimming pool for the first time, and you were the cutest little tadpole! Your swimsuit, so tiny--I didn't think there was any way you would fit into it, but it fit you perfectly. You splashed and played, already such a big girl. Here we are, with the passing of your first Halloween. We had to trick-or-treat with both sets of grandparents, so you were able to wear Tinkerbell the first night, but your Grammy in her wise shopping was able to find you a Peapod outfit! I can't tell you the smile you brought to my face:) On Halloween night, you walked with the rest of the big kids right up to the homes to show off your costume and trick-or-treat, and no one remembered ever seeing such a magnificent Tinkerbell. You are such a blessing to your Daddy and me. I am quick to realize there's only one more first holiday for you, and it's fitting your last "first" holiday is Thanksgiving. It's a reminder of how thankful I am for the year I have spent with you, the rich gift given to me by Him that I did not deserve but that I cherish with each fleeting moment.
I love you my blessing, my first peapod!
Mommy
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
The Sprout Grows into Mommy's clothes!
Letter 21
My dearest Sprout,
I must stop reading blog posts of my friends as their words and stories fill me with a void I can only fill when you are safely tucked in my arms. And alas, as a working mommy, I can't call out to you during working hours and see you stumble into my arms. Instead, I live though text messages, videos, and pictures that your sitter so graciously sends to me. I long to be teaching you God's world through crafts, books, and song. But, it's during these lonely times when I must remind myself of the times we do share together. You are walking now and becoming more brave with each step. The Lord has blessed me with such a loving child. I marvel at you as you stretch your arms out to loved ones so that they, too, can experience the miracle of you close to their beating hearts. There is no greater sound than hearing you call for your Mama. That's ME--I'm your Mama.
Tasked with the responsibility of cleaning out your drawers to pack the small clothes and replace them with larger items, I cried. How is it that my Peapod sprouted so quickly? Through my blubbering sobs, your Daddy reminded me of the blessing that comes with your growth--it means you are healthy. We prayed nightly that the Lord would richly bless us with a healthy baby. On December 8, He did. He gave you to us to raise and watch grow in hopes that we would teach you about His merciful love and grace--and my Maddie Grace, we aim to do just that. So, continue to grow my sweet Sprout. I love you at all times, not just when we are together. Your next lesson from your Mama is coming soon.
I love you my growing sprout,
Mommy
I must stop reading blog posts of my friends as their words and stories fill me with a void I can only fill when you are safely tucked in my arms. And alas, as a working mommy, I can't call out to you during working hours and see you stumble into my arms. Instead, I live though text messages, videos, and pictures that your sitter so graciously sends to me. I long to be teaching you God's world through crafts, books, and song. But, it's during these lonely times when I must remind myself of the times we do share together. You are walking now and becoming more brave with each step. The Lord has blessed me with such a loving child. I marvel at you as you stretch your arms out to loved ones so that they, too, can experience the miracle of you close to their beating hearts. There is no greater sound than hearing you call for your Mama. That's ME--I'm your Mama.
Tasked with the responsibility of cleaning out your drawers to pack the small clothes and replace them with larger items, I cried. How is it that my Peapod sprouted so quickly? Through my blubbering sobs, your Daddy reminded me of the blessing that comes with your growth--it means you are healthy. We prayed nightly that the Lord would richly bless us with a healthy baby. On December 8, He did. He gave you to us to raise and watch grow in hopes that we would teach you about His merciful love and grace--and my Maddie Grace, we aim to do just that. So, continue to grow my sweet Sprout. I love you at all times, not just when we are together. Your next lesson from your Mama is coming soon.
I love you my growing sprout,
Mommy
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