Thursday, December 15, 2011
Letter 24
Dearest Peapod,
Your birthday is now past, and I cannot yet fathom I am the mommy to a 1 year old. Gone are the days of holding you in my arms to rock you to sleep. The days of your adventures have begun. Seeking out the dangers and gifts of this world, you walk gracefully in my shadow, following where I lead. I know I must set the example, yet I fear the example you see. Although I realize I am less than perfect, and my God forgives my shortcomings, I despair at the thought you might only see my faults. I pray, for your sake, you are more like YOU, and less like me. You are so incredibly innocent and trusting; I am so very damaged and unable to trust. You seek the comfort of all; I find no comfort. You realize you are not always in control and need help; I refuse to believe I am not in control nor can I ask for help. As the years continue to pass for you my sweet sprout, I hope you never change.
I love you my innocent pea,
Mommy
Your birthday is now past, and I cannot yet fathom I am the mommy to a 1 year old. Gone are the days of holding you in my arms to rock you to sleep. The days of your adventures have begun. Seeking out the dangers and gifts of this world, you walk gracefully in my shadow, following where I lead. I know I must set the example, yet I fear the example you see. Although I realize I am less than perfect, and my God forgives my shortcomings, I despair at the thought you might only see my faults. I pray, for your sake, you are more like YOU, and less like me. You are so incredibly innocent and trusting; I am so very damaged and unable to trust. You seek the comfort of all; I find no comfort. You realize you are not always in control and need help; I refuse to believe I am not in control nor can I ask for help. As the years continue to pass for you my sweet sprout, I hope you never change.
I love you my innocent pea,
Mommy
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